Thursday's Thirteen: Men

My family and I worked in the yard today. I got some weeding done in the garden, but not enough.

I'm pooped so I'm posting another quick and dirty Thursday's Thirteen, this one for the men. I got it off of Merle's blog.

Top Twenty International Rules of Manhood. From an Australian newspaper.

1. Under no circumstances may 2 men share an umbrella.

2. Any man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten.

3. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

4. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

5. Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden, however complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

6. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is entirely optional.

7. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

8. When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score
but you may never ask who's playing.

9. It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.

10. If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.

11. Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

12. Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

13. A man in the company of a hot suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

And here's the bonus, the rest of the list, enjoy.

14. Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last piece if pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.

15. Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.

16. If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.

17. Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on an equal footing, ie., both urinating, both waiting in line etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

18. It is acceptable for you to drive her car, but it is not acceptable for her to drive yours.

19. Thou should not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue

20. The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you would know what" gets an Xbox. End of story.